5 Things You Should Always Keep Private: The Stoic Guide to Privacy

5 Things You Should Always Keep Private: The Stoic Guide to Privacy

Privacy proves precious today, yet its preservation as a virtue traces back millennia. Even that pillar of ancient wisdom – Stoic philosophy – highlighted discreet secrecy as imperative for cultivating virtue. By strategically keeping certain intimate matters private from outward eyes, the Stoics believed individuals could retain independence and define themselves amidst life’s storms.

This privacy is centered on selectively concealing the innermost personal details that otherwise bred vulnerability without cause. Rather than publicity, personal growth, and self-mastery develop best in sheltered spaces safe from judgment. Therein, we gain resilience and autonomy regardless of external circumstances or zeitgeists urging disclosure. Through exploring five key areas the Stoics advised keeping closely guarded, we can also construct a privacy philosophy despite modern connectivity. Dignity and poise begin from within the safety of seclusion.

1. Your Deepest Fears and Insecurities

The Stoic philosophers believed facing your fears and overcoming weaknesses through reason, logic, and wisdom was important. However, they cautioned that publicly airing your most intimate personal struggles can compromise your dignity and resilience. Some things are better left unpublished.

While the Stoics emphasize clear-eyed self-assessment, publicly divulging your deepest insecurities about career, relationships, aging, or other anxieties often does more harm than good. It shifts focus to vulnerability rather than overcoming. As Epictetus stated, “Lameness impedes the leg, but not to the will.” Share fears privately with those who truly matter. Handled with wisdom and self-mastery, these sensitive revelations need not define you.

2. Details About Your Health and Body

Caring correctly for physical and mental health constitutes an essential act of Stoic self-love. However, certain bodily functions and health conditions ultimately include private information that does not require disclosure. As Marcus Aurelius declared, “What matters most is how well you walk through the fire.” Protect patient dignity.

While the Stoics detached inherent worth from the impermanent physical form, they did value the body as the housing of the soul. Its care fosters the self-control and clear mind the philosophy cultivates. However, oversharing intimate health details makes one vulnerable without cause. Keep private what the public does not need to know to make your path easier.

3. Your Financial Information

The Stoics also practiced detachment around material possessions and wealth. Epictetus noted, “Wealth consists not of having great possessions, but in having few wants.” Proper security derives from self-mastery rather than money.

Consequently, those following Stoic teaching today would be wise to guard their financial data closely closely. This includes income, purchases, account details, and investments. Keeping economic conditions strictly confidential preserves independence and autonomy. This prevents the overvaluing of social or material definitions of self-worth. Remain self-defined.

4. Your Romantic Relationships

Contrary to the common misconception of Stoics as coldly detached ascetics, their philosophy celebrated human bonds. This included romantic partnerships rooted in mutual understanding and clear communication. Such profound intimacy deserves discretion and privacy to nurture it.

As Epictetus stated, “If you want to improve, be content to appear clueless or stupid in extraneous matters.” Formalizing commitment creates an inner haven safe from outside judgment. Protect confidences shared within the trusting relationship. Thus, you demonstrate the respect and care Stoics also highlighted as virtuous.

5. Your Innermost Thoughts and Reflections

Central Stoic practices included journaling, meditation, and reflective contemplation to enrich inner understanding. By turning attention inward, they sought to manage emotional reactions and distinguish truth from deception. This inner freedom allowed living gracefully aligned with nature’s wisdom.

Consequently, an individual’s profound personal ponderings arrived at through such thoughtful self-examination constitute intensely private material. The candid insights and ideas recorded deserve secrecy and discretionary sharing only with those closest confidants who understand you best. Keep them part of your inner sanctum, safe from careless exposure or judgment. Treasure the hidden garden of your innermost mind. Its fruits ripen fully in privacy.

The Stoics realized that wisdom, growth, and dignity require cultivating an inner fortress separated by degrees from the outward social realm of worldly pursuits. We share ourselves strategically, retaining privacy around our most intimate fears and reflections. This preserves freedom and self-definition regardless of externals. Such privacy remains eternally sensible.

Case Study: Practicing Stoic Privacy

Will first embraced Stoic philosophy after a painful divorce and losing his executive-level job within a few months. His three areas of focus began by keeping private his crushing insecurities about this major significant reversal, health issues that developed from stress, and the significant impact on his once comfortable financial standing.

As someone who previously networked and overshared constantly to maintain professional status, Will now sees the wisdom in Stoic restraint. He journaled extensively to process fears about restarting a career and any prospects of future relationships in light of perceived failures. However, he shared vulnerabilities only with a trusted counselor and two closest friends who offered support without judgment.

Regarding health, Will practiced more outstanding excellence through diet and exercise and addressed long-ignored symptoms like fatigue and migraines exacerbated by stress. However, he told even relatives that work-life had impacted energy levels, not specifying ailments that he worked privately to improve.

Similarly, while needing to economize, Will revealed the extent of lost savings, investments, and debts to no one besides an accountant assisting financially. They focus more on skill-building while living, which means that social status from appearances or past income level matters much less. Contentment comes from within.

A year later, Will’s application of Stoic privacy principles helped them regain emotional and physical equilibrium and restore financial independence through prudent budgeting and conscious choices guided by his values. He shares his journey selectively should any details aid others while safeguarding personal boundaries to make decisions from a place of internal clarity and self-reliance. For him, privacy preserves dignity and room for essential growth.

Key Takeaways

  • Safeguard your innermost anxieties and doubts – voicing intimate struggles can undermine resilience.
  • Keep bodily functions and health conditions confidential – preserve dignity by avoiding overexposure.
  • Maintain secrecy around financial status – self-worth stems from within, not material assets.
  • Exercise discretion in romantic partnerships – privacy nurtures profound bonds rooted in trust
  • Protect your candid self-reflections – inner growth requires space safe from judgment.


The ancient wisdom of Stoic philosophy emphasizes building strength of character by directing our focus inward. By keeping our deepest fears and reflections discreetly veiled from the public eye, we retain personal autonomy and the freedom to grow. Exposing intimate details, whether emotional struggles, bodily functions, finances, relationships, or candid musings, unnecessarily opens us to vulnerability and external values. Instead, the Stoics recommend preserving an inner citadel around life’s most private aspects. Respecting appropriate privacy allows us to define ourselves based on self-mastery rather than public validation. This grants the clarity and self-control to walk our chosen path by inner light with dignity. Such protective seclusion promotes living virtuously according to nature. By setting wise boundaries around what we conceal versus reveal, Stoics develop unshakeable poise from within. Our intrinsic worth shines brighter when we retain secrecy around our innermost sanctuary.